Classic: Don't Touch Me I'm on Disability.

Perhaps the paradigmatic joke about disability is the "Don't touch me, I'm on disability" joke. There are many versions of this joke. Here's one:

A blind Irishman walks into a bar. Hearing that Jesus is at one of the tables in back, he says to the bartender, "Draw me a Guiness and send one to Jesus while you're at it."

A few minutes later, a wheelchair-bound African-American guy rolls in. He sees Jesus and tells the bartender to get him and whiskey and send one back to Jesus.

Next a redneck in a neck brace enters, buys himself a Budweiser and sends a can over to Jesus.

On his way out, Jesus stops to thank each man. He touches the Irish guy, curing him of blindness. "Thank you Jesus, now I can see!" Then he touches the African-American man, who rises from his wheelchair, now able to walk. He approaches the redneck, who backs away saying, "Please don't touch me. I'm on disability."